I accept your faulty perception of me.

My therapist wrote these words for me to go over. And over and over. And over. So much so I had her write them down so I wouldn’t forget. I think part of me feared them, and the truth, because that post it fell out in my van between my seat and the middle console. So then, in a moment of bravery of owning the words I snapped this pic. And then, I decided to share this truth with you all.

Now get this, When I first heard her tell me these words I was like, “I don’t really like that…it makes me uncomfortable.” And I squirmed a bunch in the seat.

So, as a good therapist would do, she repeated them and then had me say them out loud.

I squirmed more.

And in that uncomfortable, I realized a bit of truth - I hate being misunderstood. I hate the faulty perception. I couldn’t accept others not seeing me as “good” or “put-together” or <add what you’d like>.

That dislike of the faulty perception only kept me trapped.

Bound into being a bit more quiet, bound into justifying myself, bound into being, as she put it “perfect enough” so I could hypothetically control the perception.

Other people’s perceptions are out of our individual control.

Did you hear that?

We can only control our own self.

We can do the best we can, we can try, we can be love and then we can live untethered to the perceptions others might make.

It allows our spirits to be free.

It allows creativity to flourish.

It allows relationships to develop.

It allows true self.

Friends, maybe this will help you.

I know it took a bit of cutting to my core truth looking at my heart to get to the place where I could say that with freedom.

Showing up in this world mattters.

Being your true self matters.

So yes, life is about learning, and for me, a great deal of letting go. It’s about never believing perfection is the epitome, but rather that life - with its valleys and peaks and normal days - is truly the ultimate gift.

Life is rarely perfect.

But honestly, it’s the imperfection that makes it beautiful. And for me, part of my untethered journey is finally getting to the place where I simply can accept a faulty perception.

And move on.

-Rachel

#findingjoy

#getyoursparkback

Ps….it’s been three years since she wrote those words for me. Three years of investing in my heart, in working through things, and in learning to lean into my courage. My book, Get Your a Spark Back, is a result of those years of work and me learning to let go, to trust, and to take the next steps again.

Source: Facebook - Finding Joy